


Potty Mouth

by FantasyABC



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: BAMF Lily, Comedy, Crack, Friendship, Gen, Humor, Lily Evans Potter Lives, Lily is Cool, No Romance, Petunia is done, Severus doesn't know what to do, Short, Swearing, badass lily
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:20:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27623297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FantasyABC/pseuds/FantasyABC
Summary: Potty mouth Lily doesn't like Severus saying 'mudblood'. crackfic
Relationships: Lily Evans Potter & Severus Snape
Comments: 2
Kudos: 26





	Potty Mouth

"I don't need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!"

Mudblood...

Mudblood...

Mudblood...

The word echoed, and Severus immediately regretted the words that came out from his lips.

"I don't need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!" He couldn't believe he had just said that.

"L-Lily...I-I..."

It was a time when people in school were wary of Slytherin, due to its history and its breed of Death Eaters.

Those who witnessed the scene couldn't help but feel bad for the girl, they didn't care about Severus. Everyone in Hogwarts knew of the two friends' relationship: one was a muggle-born Gryffindor and the other a gloomy Slytherin. Everyone knew it wouldn't last, and due to this accident, it was just confirmed-Severus showed that he was just a typical Slytherin.

The surrounding people pitied the poor muggle-born after all she was betrayed by her so-called friend.

'Mudblood' was considered a demeaning slur, usually uttered in privacy. To say that out loud in front of a large group of people... No one wouldn't be angry.

After all, she did for him, and he threw away her trust. At least now she'll learn to not trust a Slytherin...

"...Li...ly...I-I...didn't..." Looking at lily who was looking at the ground, Severus thought he had made her cry. He noticed her fist was clenched, and his heart couldn't help but break.

"Who?" A small voice escaped the petite redheaded girl.

"Eh?"

"WHO THE FUCK TAUGHT MA SMOL BOI THAT FUCKING WORD!"

"IT MUST BE THOSE FUCKING BITCHES FROM THE SHITTY SLYTHERIN ASS PIT! WAS IT THAT BITCH MALFOY OR PUSSY ROSIER?"

"E-eh, l-lily..."Looking at the angry figure of lily, Severus wanted to cry. He realized...She was furious.

" IM GONNA FUCKING WHIP THOSE SKINNY FLAT ASSES.;-_$';!(;#467(;_-(!;: HOW DARE THEY CORRUPT SEVERUS, MA LIL BOY, MAMA'S GONNA TEACH THOSE FUCKERS SO EFFING $;:-($(;;( AND WHIP THOSE)):5789$?:$}~ TILL THOSE LIL MAGGOTS ~*~\\} -5_";8!:75$_."

"SEVERUS COME WITH ME AND TELL ME WHO TAUGHT YOU THAT WORD AND IMMA )%},% WOP THEIR $?;5$)() TILL THEIR DESCENDANTS CAN FEEL THE ASS WOPPIN#*."

Easily lifting Severus up onto her shoulders like it was nothing, Lily turned to the Slytherin common room. But before that, she turned toward the marauders and gave them a chilling death glare.

Just a few minutes before they pulled down Severus' pants in front of everyone.

And in her lowest voice "Imma fuck you up real good after I do those shits in the pit."

Turning, Lily ran off with Severus on her shoulders to find the person who taught Severus the 'bad word'.

In the silent outdoors not a single word could be heard except for a chirp here and there, and the wind that blew past everyone.

When Lily comes back from Hogwarts for summer break

Lily: Tuney! Severus said a bad word.

Petunia:...Severus? (in all honestly Petunia didn't believe her)

Lily: Yes!

Petunia: Shut up isn't a bad word, Lily...

Lily: He's never said shut up before... It's worse!

Petunia: Shit? Fuck? Bitch?

Lily: No he said... mudblood!

Petunia: Oh that word... I guess in wizarding context it's considered xenophobic...or blood phobic..?

Lily: Yeah...Those bitch ass Slithering Snakes probably fucking taught him that word. They're trying to corrupt my Lil baby, those fucking shits -6_34-8);:$$#:((;;=¶}{{¥π..."

Petunia: ...Yeah...They must be a bad influence...


End file.
